Failures and blessings.
Have you ever actually taken a moment to step back, and reflect on your entire life - and realize how blessed you actually are? It doesn't matter what you've been through. Well, it does - do not take that statement as me being cold.. I simply mean that we have all been through our own versions of Hell.. but guess what? Look in the mirror... you are ALIVE. How many people die everyday? Too many to count. Suicide, gunfire, war, diseases, murders, guerrilla warfare overseas in the Third World countries... we are so blessed to live in a First World country, where we are free to do as we please, free to live our lives without chains weighing us down. Think about all the good things you have in your life. Even if it is not much, even if all you have is your family, and you're not the richest, but you have love... you are insanely lucky. So many people do not even have families. So many people do not even have love. If all you have is yourself, and your friends, and no family - you are also blessed. You have friends. People to rely on, and whether you agree with me or not - I have learned that friends can become family quite easily. And well, again, if all you have is yourself.. if you feel alone... like no one understands you, no one "gets" you, like you're worthless and nothing to the world.. remember this : every living thing on Earth has to breathe. We ALL consume breaths... every animal, every human being (all seven billion of us)... and whenever you're feeling alone, just remember that. You're not alone. We are all breathing right there along side of you. And you are blessed. You're blessed because you're alive.
We only get one chance in this life, (although Buddhist religions believe in reincarnation)-- I believe that if such is true, THIS life we are living now, is the most important one of all. Why are you sad? Pursue your dreams. Do not let anyone ever tell you, that something is impossible, or that you cannot do something. I am going to tell you a secret: YOU CAN DO ANYTHING. Go do what you've wanted to do your whole life, but have been too afraid to do. Go skydiving. Write a novel. Ask out the girl you're scared will say no. Go jump into a cold lake during a Polar Swim. Go raise money for your favourite charity. Write a love ballad. Fuckin' rap, as white, as dark, whatever you are. Sing at the top of your lungs. Go for a walk... and breathe in the fresh air that surrounds you... and remember you are, once again, never alone. Seven billion people, and all the animals in the world, are breathing along with you. Isn't that truly amazing?
I am so blessed to be here. I am blessed to have the passion for writing that I do. I am blessed to have the passion for life that I once thought I had lost. Truth is, it just took me a lot to gain it back. I felt alone. I wanted to die. I hated everything. And then I did exactly what I mentioned in the first part of this entry...I took a step back, and looked at my life. And realized how truly blessed I am, to even be alive. There are many times when I thought that that moment would be my last. I thought to myself, "is this how it's really going to end?"... and for some reason, for some reason WAY beyond me - I am still here. I'm still alive after all the crazy things I have done... and it can actually bring me to tears, because I never thought I deserved this. Until I figured out, that me writing, and sharing my story, is my purpose. And I have a family, and friends, who love me. I am blessed to be alive and have a bright future ahead of me.
Smile, you're beautiful.
xo
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